


I am what I am

by FanGirlyGlee



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Omegaverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-16 07:16:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16081160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanGirlyGlee/pseuds/FanGirlyGlee
Summary: This is partly a character study of Nate, Mick, and Ray but delves into the importance of friends & family, loving yourself, and following your heart.  Explores the impact of Nate's relationship with Amaya on his life and how Ray and Mick come to see each other as more than just friends.Later chapters will have explicit sexual content. Also, this is my first Omegaverse fic with my very own set of assumptions so check out the notes.Bits of Season 2 and 3 could be spoiled by this, but it's fairly AU.





	1. Born this Way

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance for the length of this introduction, but if I don't explain where I'm coming from this fic will be really confusing. 
> 
> To begin with, I believe the character of Nate was intended to come across as a younger man than he often seems in the third season. Someone in his late twenties or early thirties more easily fills a slot for Ray's younger brother/best pal/hero protege. Also it puts Amaya and Nate's relationship in perspective as he is her first lover and she could be the first woman for whom he feels so deeply.
> 
> Next is to lay out the rules for my Omegaverse. A/B/O fics are a guilty pleasure of mine even though some stretch the limits of my ability to suspend disbelief. Thus I have attempted to create my own framework that retains much of the original spirit, but satisfies just enough of my need for science. Ironically I am not a biologist, but I pestered one until he helped me flesh out a few things.
> 
> First, I assume that female fertility is nowhere near as great as it is in the real world. If somewhere in humanity's evolution an outside event caused females to go into estrus a maximum of three times a year, that could spur the appearance of a mutation allowing some males to become hyper fertile thus increasing the likelihood that genes will be passed on. 
> 
> Thus, only males are A/B/O. It is a sex-linked trait, potentially something on the Y-chromosome that is activated by something on the X-chromosome. If it isn't activated, the male is a beta aka a garden variety dude. Omegas produce spermatazoa, but not as much as a beta and far less than an alpha. Omega-omega pairs are not likely to have viable offspring. 
> 
> Both males and females produce pheromones and both can detect them. The amount, or the strength of the pheromones varies by ancestry, age, general health, etc., but omega pheromones are more potent than female.  
> The period of highest fertility (male or female) is generally referred to as "heat" and is not a life-threatening event, but a period of increased sexual desire and desirability. The scent of a male or female in heat can cause an alpha to go into "rut", which again is nothing terrible. Just a strong urge to have sex and reproduce.  
> Heats and ruts can be uncomfortable at times or cause social embarassment which is why there are pharmaceuticals people call "suppressants" but really just mitigate the symptoms of heat/rut. I'm not going to address menstruation. Let's just assume it happens.
> 
> Finally, it occurred to me that just because omegas exist, it doesn't mean that every group on Earth is fine with men getting pregnant by other men. Depending on the concentration of omegas in a particular population and the rise of various cultural and religious groups, I can see that some communities would shun omegas as somehow unnatural or treat them like second class citizens. Conversely omegas could be looked down upon if they are not interested in bearing children. Basically I don't envision people being more or less kind to each other than they already are.

**Prologue:  Meet the New Guy**

In spite with the bizarre circumstances surrounding their first meeting, Nate knew almost immediately that he and Ray were gonna be best buds.  There was something about the science geek that put Nate at ease even while his stomach was trying to escape his body every time he time-jumped.   Mick would accuse Ray of using puppy dog eyes to get his way, and Nate could see his point.  Maybe Ray was a little bit dog-like, but in the best way possible. Sure, he was nice to almost everyone he met, but as was the case with man's best friend, if Ray Palmer really liked someone they just c _ouldn't_ be all bad.

Since it was Nate's research and determination that reunited the Legends after Rip scattered them across time it was obvious he'd be an asset to the team.  Ray was happy to help the historian get situated; starting with the dramatic re-telling of the many adventures surrounding their original mission.  Nate was blown away by accounts of the Hawks, Time Masters, and Vandal Savage.  It helped that Ray did voices for everyone; really made the stories come alive.

He even took the time to re-introduce Gideon, explaining that she was, “Not just the ship's AI. She's our navigator, den mother, reference section, and medical support.  She has access to some really cool stuff from the future – yours and mine - including the scent blockers most of us wear when we're on missions.”

“I thought you smelled funny!” Nate exclaimed. “I mean, even after you got all the dinosaur doo doo hosed off.”   Both men snickered like children until Ray continued.

“Anyway, Gideon keeps our medical needs confidential.  If you want birth control, suppressants, or anything else just ask her.  If you want time off for heat or rut you just have to work it out with Gideon – and Sara since I guess she's captain now.  We try to stay out of each other's business as much as we can despite living and working together. Speaking of which, I'll leave you to get checked out.  It's thorough, but hey, you never know when you might need a new hand.”  Nate chuckled nervously.

**Part 1**

Nate was excited to be part of a real team.  He'd hadn't had many friends as a child; readily calling his early years sheltered, knowing that was an understatement.   Just as the term shelter implied, at a minimum, protection from the elements, all of Nate's basic needs were met.  He lived in one house from his birth until he left for college, always had enough to eat, and had two parents who cared for his physical well-being.  Still, there always seemed to be something missing.  His father was not an emotionally demonstrative man.  Looking through family photo albums for a grade school project, Nate found one snapshot in ten where Hank Heywood _might_ have been smiling.  It couldn't have been easy having a son in and out of hospitals before he turned five.   The Heywoods were fortunate that Nate was born _after_ the worst years of the blood supply crisis when HIV/AIDS claimed the lives of so many hemophiliacs.  New drugs and therapies were emerging steadily as their boy grew up, but some things remained out of reach.  When he was fourteen Nate's doctors informed his parents that childbirth would never be advisable for an omega hemophiliac.   Personally, Nate had never thought about it; focused more on making it to adulthood than hypothetical offspring.  Once he heard his mother crying late at night as Hank groused, “Christ, he can't even ride a bike.  What the hell would be the point of him having kids?” 

Nate hated knowing he would never live up to his father's expectations, and vowed that he would not be useless.  He got his tubes tied, took heat suppressants, and waited for medical science to catch up to _his_ plans to live life to the fullest.  When he went off to college, at just sixteen, he devised started an exercise program that was designed to build strength while minimizing the risk of joint and muscle bleeds.  He was determined not only to see the world, but to make a difference in it, just like his grandfather, Commander Steel.

xxx

Mick's mother didn't need any advanced diagnostic equipment to tell her she'd given birth go an alpha.  She looked at the squalling baby boy in her arms and knew he was going to be just as bull-headed as his daddy, but the Rory household already had one alpha, and making room for a second was easier said than done.  There were moments of peace, usually at Grandma Rory's house in the country.  There a wild young boy could run free, coming home whenever he got hungry and tired.  “Ma, could you at least keep some pants on him?” Dick pleaded.

“He'll be stuck in clothes the rest of his life.  Let the boy be.  Mikey hears the old ways callin'.”

“My name's, Mick, Gramma,” the dark-haired boy mumbled through a mouthful of mashed potatoes.

No matter how his father complained about the lack of discipline, he wouldn't keep his mother from knowing her only grandchild.  When Mick stayed the night at her house, Grandmother would set out single candle on the kitchen table and light it just before bedtime.   The young boy waited breathlessly for her to strike a long wooden match, eager for a whiff of sulfur.  “You look into the flame, Mikey,” she advised.  “It’s like the fire in you – the way it crackles and licks at your heart.  One day someone will call to the fire in your belly.  It will roar at first, then die down.  You’ll know you’ve found your mate.”

Mick's eyes were glued to the dancing wick. 

“Tell me the words again,” he whispered.  “The words Grandpa said to you when he knew you were his mate.”

“Silly boy, you don't even know the old tongue.”

“I like the way it sounds.”

“Hmm, well let's try it in English then while you have a snack.” 

“I hope my mate knows how to make cookies.”

“Ahh well, if not you'll still have me, darling boy.”

Then one day his grandmother was gone and Mick's heart broke for the first time.  He managed to light candles, and more, trying to make himself feel safe like he was in her kitchen.  If he concentrated on the flame he could shut out everything else; the reports from school, the shouting from his parents’ bedroom.  He couldn't tell whether they were fighting or trying to make another baby.  Maybe if his Mom had another baby she wouldn't be sad.  Maybe the new baby wouldn't be so dumb, and a disappointment. 

“Boy, what have I told you about playing with matches?”

“I wasn't playing, Dad.  I was trying to find the fire in me.  I want to find my mate.”  For once Dick stopped shouting and spoke gently to his son.

“You don’t need to worry about all that nonsense yet.  You'll find a decent girl when the time is right.”

“What about an omega, Dad? Or a beta? What if my mate's a boy?”

His father's rage returned in an instant, prompting Mick to press himself flat against the wall, shrinking down to become a smaller target. 

“You leave omega trash out of this! Go to bed.”

Mick cringed, remembering a tirade earlier that evening about the omega who had disrespected his father, resulting in a lesson needing to be taught, and Dick Rory being fired from another job.

xxx

“Hey sport, what's up? Your mom says you wanted to talk to me?”  Ray approached, his face scrunched up with worry. 

“Um, I asked if you guys were disappointed that I'm not an alpha like Sydney.”

Ray's father reached out and wrapped an arm around his son's shoulders.  “Ray, that's like asking if we're sorry you have brown eyes.  It's part of you, so it can’t be good or bad.  It just is.  Remember how we talked about what makes a person?”

Ray nodded.  “Not just a collection of parts, but something wholly new.”

“That's right.  There will never be another Ray Palmer just like you.”  The boy seemed to consider the statement, his brow furrowing.  His father sighed.  “Please stop worrying about clones, Ray.  I promise no one is working on that right now.”

“That you know of,” Ray pointed out, smiling a bit. 

“You got me there, kiddo.  Any evil geniuses in town trying to clone people probably wouldn’t ask for permits from the city planning office.  So I have no way of knowing what they’re up to.  I'll see what I can do about that.”

“Thanks Dad.”

**Part 2**

Ray stuffed his sheets and duvet into the washing machine and poured what he was sure was more than enough detergent on the bundled-up wad of cotton.  He was trying to decide whether warm-warm was better than warm-cold when Sydney walked past the laundry room and stopped to give him grief.  “What's shakin’, Ray-Ray?”

“Shut up, Sydney.  Don't have time for this.  I gotta do laundry.”

“Since when do you do your own – oh did you finally have a _special_ dream?

Ray's cheeks burned as he pulled out the knob to start the washer.  “Yeah, so what? It happens to lots of guys.”

“Yeah, I'm just surprised you didn't freak out, think you were dying, and cry for Mom.”

“I'm not stupid! I knew what it was.  I just didn't expect there to be so much.”

Sydney snorted.  “Did you dream about touching a boob or getting a perfect score on the SAT?”  Ray ignored the jibe.

“Did-did you feel weird when it happened to you?”

“Like how?”

“I dunno, like feverish and kinda barfy.  And....”

His voice trailed off as the room started spinning.  He fell backward, his vision going black as he heard Sydney shouting.

“Mom!  Mom, come quick! Something's wrong with Ray.”

 

He woke up in a hospital bed, tucked under a warm blue blanket, and hooked up to a heart monitor.  “Am I gonna die?” 

 

xxx

Nate fussed mightily as his mother handed him several pills.  “Why do I have to take these?”

“We talked about this, Honey.  You're not ready for all the trouble that comes with a heat.”

“You know, in the past many omegas my age would already have given birth to at least one child.   I think my body knows what it's doing.” His mother sighed loudly.

“Nathaniel, the average age at which an omega's first heat occurs has been rising steadily since the mid-nineteenth century, keeping pace with life expectancy, but is not a reliable indicator of physical, let alone emotional, maturity.  If we applied such logic to the female reproductive cycle my body _told_ me I was ready to have a child when I was eleven.  Would that have been a good idea?”

“No,” he replied grumpily. 

“Biology doesn’t always know best.  When you turn eighteen you can go nuts and let some alpha rut with you until your hips dislocate.  Until then it's my job to keep you in one piece, and I take my job very seriously.”

Clearly disgusted by the mental image, Nate scowled. “Gross, Mom!  I'm not even gay.”

Mrs. Heywood smiled knowingly.  “Then I suppose you might want to take something that helps keep you from attracting unwanted attention.”

Nate swallowed his medication dutifully.  He cursed when he saw her dusting her debate team trophies later that afternoon.

Xxx

The sound of a fist pounding on the door echoed with the pounding in Mick's head.  “Boy, get up!  There's work to do before you mom gets back from the doctor.”

Mick managed to drag himself up off the bed as his father loomed in the bedroom doorway.    “Dad, I don't feel good.”  His skin was hot, but he shivered in a sweat-soaked t-shirt.  Dick looked him up and down and sniffed the air.  He grimaced.  “Where’d you get off to yesterday?” 

“Around the neighborhood.  Just goofin' around.  I didn't get into any trouble, I swear.”

“Who was with you? The Bennett boy?”

“Yeah he was with us for a while but he went back home right away.  He looked sick.”

His father heaved a sigh and put his hand on Mick's shoulder.  “Son, Mrs. Bennett's been going around the neighborhood all morning apologizing for her boy getting out of the house.  He's an omega and he's in his first heat.  Shoulda been locked up to avoid this very thing.”  It took a few seconds before Mick understood what his father wouldn't say.  Mick had been exposed to strong omega pheromones and his body was ramping up its response.  “I don't like this.  I'm itchy and hot and I want to run, but my legs are like jelly.”

“That's rut, my boy.  Your first.  I'd hoped you'd be older, but it can’t be helped.  It won't be very long.  You'll have to tough it out.”

“What?”

Not understanding what his father meant, the young man allowed himself to be led into the small bathroom at the end of the hall.  Mick sat on the toilet, wondering if he should try to take a bath or if he would pass out and drown.  Dick left momentarily, returning for a moment returning with a quilt his grandmother had made and a box of cereal.  His expression was grim.  “Listen to me, son.  This is gonna piss you off, but there's nothing for it.  All alphas gotta go through this.  You're a stubborn kid and this won't beatcha.  You'll have water and there’s some food if you even feel like eating.  Other than that, just do what comes naturally.”

“Huh?”  Before Mick could ask more questions the door was shut and locked from the outside.  The house was old and doors had been moved around rather than make repairs. There was no way Mick open it without a key.  “Dad?” he called plaintively. “Dad, please.  I'm scared.”

 

He stripped off his clothes after the first hour, laying spread eagle on the floor with his back on the cool tile.  He counted every crack in the plaster ceiling twice until even the slight movement of air across his skin was needle sharp.  Eyes shut tight, he called to mind images from the dog-eared issue of Penthouse hidden in the brush behind his friend Jimmy's house and took himself in hand.  Somehow it felt dirtier than it ever had before. 

 

Relief was short lived and the half a jar of cold cream he found in the medicine cabinet helped with the inevitable chafing.  He drank copious amounts of water from the tap and laid damp wash cloths across the back of his neck.  When he remembered the lighter in his jeans pocket he began to laugh and cry at the same time.  He flicked it open and set it on the side of the tub.  Wrapped in the quilt he whispered the words he'd heard in his grandma's kitchen as he stared into the flame.

“Beloved mate, I have waited for you so long. I-I promise to protect...”

**Part 3**

Juvie wasn't necessarily a bad place even if there were a lot of dumb rules.  He was surrounded by other young alphas with plenty of opportunities to work out aggression and hormonal overload.  As long as no one was being killed, the adults tended to overlook the growling and dry humping that went on in dark corners.  Mick learned how to squeeze another alpha's knot before he stole his first beer. 

Once an omega was let into the gym the same time as the alphas and betas.  He went into heat within an hour of exposure to the powerful mixture of pheromones.   The betas scented him first, but only one left to inform an authority figure.  The others were content to watch the alphas beat each other bloody.  Mick took quite a few hits in the process of scaring off smaller boys, and his feral demeanor gave a couple of the larger guys reason to be cautious.  Eventually all but one of his rivals had retreated to lick their respective wounds.  Mick roared as he lunged and bit a chunk out of the other boy's ear.  Victorious, he picked up the cowering omega and took him to the equipment shed.  Running on adrenaline and instinct, he cleared a space and threw down some ratty blankets he found before sitting back on his heels to wait for his potential mate to stop smelling like raw fear.  It wasn't long before the whimpering omega let Mick embrace him.  Urgent kisses and whispered assurances of how strong and beautiful their babies would be were rudely interrupted by the guards breaking down the door.  They pulled the omega away before spraying pheromone neutralizer in Mick’s face and kicking him in the ribs for good measure.  The omega was hauled off to the infirmary while Mick guts turned to liquid as he heard his Gran chastising him.  “Mikey, your mate will find you.  The omega chooses the alpha.”

When it was all over, everyone was anxious scraps of information. 

“Did he beg for your knot?”

“What does slick taste like?”

Mick sneered, and shot back, “Your mom.”  The fire inside him raged with no sign of stopping.

Xxx

Ray hurriedly pulled up his jeans and underpants while Tina apologized.  “Ray, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to embarrass you.  Please sit down.  Let's talk about this.”

Cheeks flushed pink, sat on the edge of her bed.  “I was gonna tell you.  Just things got going and it felt so good and I thought maybe, um, maybe you wouldn't notice cuz you're a girl.”

Tina scooted closer to him and took his hands in hers.  “I should have asked before I got grabby.  You made me feel so good, and I really want to return the favor.   It's not a big deal, Ray. I promise.  So you're a little different down there.  Different isn't bad.”

He chewed his bottom lip.  “You don't think I'm weird?”

Tina giggled in response.  “Ray, you're pretty darn weird.  But that's why I like you.  Not everybody gets all hot and bothered over the discovery of a new planet...”

“Trans-Neptunian object,” he interrupted and then cleared his throat nervously.  Tina kissed his cheek.

“I like you, Ray.  Maybe we can get back to the subject of your lips and mine, and if you're cool with it, I'd like to touch your not at all strange genitals.”

He grinned. “Okay, but we gotta study after.”

“Promise.”

Xxx

The pursuit of heroic deeds was frustrating at times.  Not only was Nate the youngest kid in his college classes, he couldn't get any further than second base without someone worrying they were going to kill him.  Finally he started dating Brenda.  She was funny and he could overlook the way she sometimes laughed while inhaling.  She owned the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles on DVD, which was a huge turn for Nate.  When she kissed him he decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth, not that Brenda looked like a horse no matter what those jerks in the Art History department wrote on the bathroom walls.  The important thing was that she liked him – even thought he was hot.  He decided to take a chance.  He was eighteen and could have deal with his heat however he chose. 

“How do you feel?”

“About the same as I did the last time you asked. Sorta mellow.  That could be the Boone's Farm though.  Good call on the Sangria.”

“It's my favorite,” Brenda confessed.  “Um, do you wanna watch a porno or something to get in the mood?”

Nate did a double-take.  “Did you want to watch one?”

Pulling her backpack open, Brenda produced three DVDs.  “Do you like girl on girl, or threesomes, or plain fucking?”  In response to his apparent shock, she rolled her eyes.  “I know what gets me off, Heywood. And watching you squirm isn't doin' anything for me.”

Turns out plain vanilla sex was more than enough to get Nate's heart pumping, and then the hormones started flooding his system.  He and Brenda took a break from groping each other to remove their clothing.  She spread out a towel for them to lie on.  He coughed twice.

“I don't really make that much of a mess.”

She giggled.  “This is for me, dude.  I squirt.”

“What?”

Nate definitely learned a few things that afternoon.  The first was that if he ever had sex with Brenda again he was gonna need a couple more towels.  Also, the basement was not sufficiently removed from the den for his mother to avoid hearing loud exclamations of who was gonna cum. 

“Nate?  What's all that whooping?”

“Mom!  For the love of God do not come downstairs.”

“Why not? I thought you and Brenda were – oh! Oh, I see.  Well, I suppose I'll just make some sandwiches and leave them in the kitchen if you get hungry later.”

Brenda dissolved in fits of laughter, which was just a little contagious.  Laughing led to tickling which led to kissing and more wonderful sex.  Nate's first heat only lasted twelve hours, but he was glad for the experience.

  **Part 4**

 Mick and Len were partners, not mates.  Alpha-alpha pairs were not unheard of, and Mick cared less about social norms than he did security cameras.  But Len's tastes for vapid omegas he could dominate and overconfident betas he could discard when they ceased to be amusing didn't line up with Mick's preference for sex with anyone within his field of vision who might be up for it.  Hooking up with women and betas was easy. He could be plenty charming when necessary.  He also enjoyed the occasional fight and fuck with another alpha, but when it came to omegas, Mick was always cautious. 

Every time he got out of the joint he looked forward to a post-incarceration rut.  He’d hang out in a dive, waiting the blockers to wear off, until he sniffed out the nearest omega on the edge of heat.  Then all he had to do was wait to be invited to rock their world.  Over the years he gained a reputation, not only as a competent thief and a man who didn't shy away from a fight, but a good heat partner.  Omegas who came of age before the widespread availability of heat suppressants and alpha condoms would call him a gentleman.  He was never overly rough, never bragged about who he'd bedded, and had the paperwork to prove he was a confirmed shooter of blanks.  Mick found casual company fit with his lifestyle, and eventually he stopped wondering if the people he met might be the mate he'd imagined when he was young.  There was no point in worrying about a mate when he had enough trouble taking care of himself, Len and Lisa.  As far as he was concerned, the damned Rory bloodline ended with him.

xxx 

Ray knew he was behaving oddly, and he didn't want to ruin what had been a truly lovely evening so he undressed in the walk-in closet, removing the ring box from the pocket of his suit jacket before he hung it up in the bag of things to be dry-cleaned. At the beginning of the evening he had every intention of proposing to Anna, but when he saw the way here face lit up when she held her infant niece for the first time a sudden rush doubt stopped him cold.  He brushed his teeth quickly and tried to get into bed without letting her see he was upset, but she was always too perceptive. 

“Are you going to tell me what's bothering you, Ray, or just let it eat at you all night while you pretend to sleep?”  Releasing the sigh he'd been holding in only made him feel slightly less awful. 

“You looked beautiful tonight,” he commented.

“Thank you.  Though if I'd had my dress tucked into my underwear all evening I hope you would have told me before now.”  Ray smiled in spite of himself.  He turned toward Anna and propped his head up on his arm. 

“I love you so much.  I want to be with you.  It just hit me again – how much I wish I could give you children.”  Anna brushed her fingers over his forehead.

“Oh Ray, we've talked about this.  We both want a family, and we will have one someday.  Biology doesn't make a person all that they are and it certainly doesn't define a family.  You will be a wonderful father to all of the cats I adopt to keep me company when you're working late.” Anna grinned and Ray's bad mood dissipated as he pictured himself in a bathrobe heating up milk for twelve kittens.  He laughed. 

“Shouldn't we get married first?” he teased.  “I'd like the cats to have my last name.”

“They're modern felines.  They'll hyphenate.”

Ray leapt out of bed and went to the closet, returning with the box.  He knelt by on the floor and Anna started waving him away.  “Raymond Palmer, don't you dare tease me about this.”  He showed her the ring.

“I'm serious, Anna.  I love you more than anything in this world, and I want to be with you forever.”

 

xxx

Being a rising star in an emerging field didn't leave a lot of time for dating, but Nate did have relationships in college and afterward.  Unfortunately, right now one was coming to an unceremonious end.   

“You're dumping me? I thought you were coming to my mom's for Christmas.”

His now ex-girlfriend grimaced.  “That's why I'm bringing it up now.  So we don't have to have an awkward holiday. Nate, you're fun, but we just don’t have a future together.  You're an Omega.”  He stared at her.

“Which you've known from the beginning.”

“I'm sorry.  I didn't think it was going to bother me, but it does.  I'll never be sure that you won't go in to heat some day and decide you want an Alpha instead.”  Nate was flabbergasted.

“You think I'd cheat on you at some point in the future, with some mystery man who would sway me not only from my commitment to you, but my sexual orientation?  I'm not even going to argue with you about how insulting that is. I'll put your stupid _historical_ romances in a box in the hall outside my place.  Pick them up whenever.”

 


	2. Getting to know all about you

Sara never considered herself leadership material and was mildly irritated that she’d been forced to rise to the occasion.  “Just wait until you have children of your own,” her mother often warned.  There were days Sara thought changing diapers couldn’t possibly be as difficult as wrangling the so-called Legends.  When Amaya asked to join the crew in order to find Rex Tyler's killer Sara had been cautiously optimistic that the other woman’s focus would be good for the team.  But Amaya wasn't exactly part of the team, as she would be the first to tell anyone who might ask.  At present the newbies seemed to be competing to determine who could try Sara’s patience the most.  Since he'd become Steel, Nate took every opportunity to show off his powers, which did not impress Amaya nearly as much as he probably hoped, and only served to dampen Ray's spirits.  Meanwhile Amaya preferred questioning Sara’s decisions to actual small talk. 

They'd gotten lucky with what Sara hoped would be an easy mission.  All they had to do was rescue the Duke’s eldest son and safeguard his virtue.  Trudging through the forest following a rough path in ridiculously uncomfortable shoes, she made a mental note to ask Gideon if insect repellant would negatively impact the course of history.  At least the heavy linen skirts she was wearing protected her legs.  Amaya appeared unfazed by the heat and bugs as she forged ahead, renewing her objection to Ray being left alone the young man they’d recently liberated from his captors.  “He shouldn’t have been left alone with an omega on the cusp of his first heat. Ray is defenseless without his suit.”

Sara took a deep breath and silently counted to five before she replied.  “Nate and Rory are handling the bandit problem while Jax and Stein retrieve the boy’s betrothed.  You and I already took care of the kidnappers which left Ray with guard duty.  He's clever, braver than he ought to be, and a perfect gentleman.”  Honestly, Sara hadn't felt great about leaving Ray alone in the forest with primitive weapons, but he wanted so badly to help and insisted he knew how to use a crossbow.  She could only hope that the boy's nursemaid had been exaggerating when she claimed the first heats of the omegas in the family were especially strong and their scents irresistible. 

Nearing the cottage where they’d stashed the boy, Sara detected an unusual odor, and then her ears pricked up.  Loud moans prompted her and Amaya to run into the clearing.   Despite their fears, it was clear that Ray was standing outside the cottage. He was sweating and breathing hard, but he remained in a defensive posture.  He brought the crossbow up as Amaya barreled toward him.  “Step aside,” she ordered.  Ray stood firm.  “Let me in.”

Ray's shook his head.  “Not until Sara says,” he croaked.

“What is going on in there?” Amaya demanded.

“Heat came on – by himself - Sara said no one gets in.”

“Ray!”  Sara called out.  “Stand down.”

“Aye, Captain!”  Lowering his weapon, Ray moved away from the door to allow Amaya entry.  “I'm gonna go sit in the stream,” he announced and ambled away.

The rest of the team arrived shortly with the boy's intended mate in tow.  The Duke's guards took over the scene, moving a respectable distance from the cottage to allow the happy couple some privacy.  Amaya waited until they were aboard the Waverider to confront Sara as they were changing clothes.  She was furious, not only that Ray would defy her, but that Sara could have been so foolish as to have given this job to an “unbonded alpha who lacked the necessary self-control”. 

Sara leapt to Ray's defense.  “Amaya, I don't know if you're not used to scenting omegas or what, but the kid’s pheromones were off the charts.  Yeah, he was affected, but it didn’t compromise the mission.  Let it go.” 

 Amaya attempted to appeal to a higher power.  “Gideon, tell about the men on this ship.”  Sara pursed her lips, but let the AI speak for herself.

“I'm sorry Miss Jiwe.  I do not understand your question.”

“I need to know their biological classifications.”

“I see, Miss Jiwe.  I cannot reveal that to you, or anyone else.  I have been entrusted with the health and safety of the crew of the Waverider, and I hold such information in the strictest confidence.”

This seemed to puzzle Amaya.  “Surely, Sara knows.”

“I cannot say what Captain Lance does or does not know.” 

“I do not understand you people,” Amaya huffed.

xxx

Nate was pleasantly surprised to find that Ray was right about people minding their own aboard the Waverider.  None of the other guys made a big deal of their respective classifications, which allowed Nate to speculate.  Martin was the only one with a bonded mate, and his paternal attitude toward Jax seemed typical of an older, more settled, alpha.  Jax might be an alpha himself, which would explain the intensity of Firestorm's frequent internal dialogue. 

Mick was harder to figure out.   At first Nate couldn’t fathom Ray’s fondness for a man so prickly he might as well be wearing a flashing neon “Do Not Touch” sign around his neck.  It quickly became clear that Mick was an equal opportunity curmudgeon, and for Nate, not getting special treatment was refreshing.  Then suddenly his physical limitations, so carefully hidden from the others, were replaced with genuine super powers.  Mick remained unimpressed. In contrast to Nate’s own eagerness to put a few heroic points up on the board, Mick was content to do his part, make it through the day and have a beer.  

Ray didn’t have extraordinary abilities, unless one counted an optimistic worldview that could probably survive an apocalypse.  He had the suit, and then he didn’t, and Nate felt badly about that even if Ray didn’t bring it up much. 

Unlike Nate and Ray’s easy friendship, the scientist and the thief shared a different connection, though as far as Nate could tell they weren’t involved romantically.  Still for some reason Ray risked his personal safety just to make sure Mick took slightly better care of himself than he would if left to his own devices.   Oddly both men seemed to use scent blockers even when were not on missions, though it was also possible that Mick’s natural scent was masked by the charred aroma that permeated his clothing.

Xxx

When Snart joined the do-gooders and dragged him along, Mick turned down Gideon's offer of suppressants and pheromone masking agents.  His scent glands had been scarred over for years, and he hadn't had a good rut in almost as long.  Still, it never hurt to have options.  Mick quickly assessed his new crew and decided there wasn't anyone worth pursuing if and when he felt the need to scratch his itch.  The professor and the kid were excluded automatically.  Blondie might stab him even if he never got close enough to make a move on her.  Haircut, though, had potential.  For one thing, the guy smelled like unicorn farts or something else fantastical.  It wasn't a typical omega scent – never made Mick horny.  He just felt good breathin' it in.  After Russia Mick fought the urge to kiss the boy scout hard enough to make his split lip bled fresh and mark him up so the chick with the rack would keep her distance.  But then Mick became Chronos and the flames that raged inside him were reduced to glowing embers.  When he came back to some semblance of himself he had to reassess everything, Ray included.    Mick decided to get himself a new partner; one who would listen to him bitch about the others.  

“You're doing it again, Haircut.”

“Doing what?” Ray asked, apparently unaware that he'd been making little submissive gestures all day. “Oh that. Sorry, Mick. I didn't realize.”

“I know you don't mean nuthin' by it.  Just watch yourself.”

“Got it, Mick.”  Truthfully, the occasional show of deference fed Mick's alpha pride nicely, but he didn't want Ray making a habit of it.   The nerd was goin' through a rough patch after losin' his suit; actin' like he wasn't as good as Mick knew he was.  Mick did his part to make sure Haircut kept his chin up.   

Xxx

Someone was baking something that smelled amazing.  Mick made his way to the galley to find the others already basking in the coconut-scented atmosphere.  Jax was biting into a soft-looking yellow thing and gushing.  “Man, Ray, you are going to make someone a fantastic mate someday.”  Sara and Amaya nodded in agreement.  Mick eyed the goodies with suspicion.

“What'd you make, Haircut?” Ray passed him the tray.

“They’re macaroons.  Have one.”

“Mac-a-what? Those cookies?”

“Yes, Mister Rory, they are cookies,” Martin confirmed, helping himself to one.  “Jefferson, while I agree Raymond will indeed make someone an excellent mate someday.  Today we are the fortunate beneficiaries of his considerable culinary skills.”

Mick took a bite and hummed as his tongue met warm gooey heaven.

“Holy shit these are good,” he exclaimed. 

“That's what I said, Mister Rory.”

Nate grabbed as second macaroon.  “As long as no one expects me to cook.  I can burn water.”

Amaya looked puzzled and Mick leaned in to reassure her.  “Not really.  You have to add a lot of alcohol for that to work.”

Gideon chimed in.  “Not in my kitchen, Mister Rory.”

xxx

“Sorry about the cold gun.”  Ray apologized for the third time.  He was following Mick down the corridor, picking up pieces of other man's tuxedo as he discarded them.

“We didn't blow up.  Callin' that a win.”

“True.  It's just - I know it's more than a weapon.  It's a reminder.”

“I don't need it to remember him.”

“No, I suppose not. Snart's a pretty memorable guy.”  Mick snorted derisively, which got Ray's back up. 

“What?”

“Nuthin'. You're right.  We all have our own happy memories of Snart.”  “He told you, didn't he?”  The meek tone made Mick's lip curl.  He hated when Ray backed down so easily.

“Yeah, he bragged about doin' ya after Russia.  Said he wanted you to have the full prison experience.”   To Mick's delight, Ray didn't apologize further.  Instead, shaking off whatever embarrassment he'd been feeling, he pulled himself up to his full height and smirked. 

“Is that so? Far be it from me to speak ill of the dead.  If it's one thing Leonard Snart was known for, it was his honesty.”

Mick chuckled for a bit, and then began to shake with laughter.  “Ahh, that's a good one. Let's go get a beer and some grass water or whatever the hell it is you drink.” 

“I think saving us from a bomb earns me something harder. I know where Sara keeps the good stuff.”

“Now you're talkin'.”

 

Xxx

It had been a good day all things considered.  History was restored, Ray had found enough dwarf star alloy to remake his suit, and after Sara said Gideon could fix everyone’s liver after drinking what passed for whiskey in the Wild West they retired to the local saloon.  Amaya was having an animated conversation with Jonah Hex while Sarah and Martin played cards.  Mick had wandered off somewhere while Nate and Jax tried to play Heart and Soul on the piano despite being too drunk to remember which part they were each supposed to be playing.  “Where’s Ray?” Nate asked suddenly realizing he’d gone missing. 

“Upstairs,” Sara replied, nodding her head toward the rooms on the second level.  As if on cue, there was a loud thump that shook ceiling, followed by a “Yee-ha!”

Amaya hopped up onto the piano.  “I’ve heard of men described as animals, but I think Ray might be with an actual bear.”  Nate spit out his drink.

Ray joined the group a short while later looking slightly rumpled and very relaxed.  He managed to find some sherry behind the bar and sipped at it quietly until Jax threw an arm around his shoulders.  “Damn, Ray,” Jax murmured.  “You got more game than me lately.”

“Jefferson!”  Martin shook his head in disapproval.

Ray shrugged.  “I’ve always liked big alphas.  I mean physically imposing.  Not that Bill wasn’t big, er, shut up Nate!”

Nate dissolved into a fit of giggles interrupted only when one of the bar’s other patrons came up and put a hand on his shoulder.  “Can I help you?” he asked, wiping his eyes.  The other man, a stocky blond in dusty leather leered.

“I was about to ask you the same thing.  Don’t see a lot of your kind out here.”

Instantly Nate was on his feet and shook the man’s hand off. 

“Back off, dude,” he warned.  “You’re not my type.”

The cowboy stayed in Nate’s personal space.  “Huh? You sure smell like my type.”

Jax and Ray were by their friend’s side in an instant, but Nate didn’t shrink back.  “I don’t care what I smell like or how big and strong you are.  I don’t swing that way.”  This confused the drunk alpha.  Nate continued.  “Yeah, heterosexual omega isn’t an oxymoron.  Frankly, you’re just a…”

Amaya clamped a hand over Nate’s mouth.  “Let’s just call it a night, Nathaniel.”

He let her lead him by the hand back to the Waverider.

xxx

Nate was just getting a taste of the life of a time-traveling super hero when he met Amaya.  She was a beautiful flower, and he was a bee.  Or maybe she was the sun and he was a chilly lizard.  No, that was an even worse analogy.  Amaya Jiwe was an amazing bad-ass bona fide super heroic, animal-spirit totem wearing woman and Nate wanted to be with her so badly it made his hair ache. Nate had been ticked off when Ray discouraged him from pursuing a relationship with Amaya.  He was done being told what to do when it came to his love life.  He wasn't a sickly omega, held back by his own body, any longer.  He reacted badly, with jabs at Ray's apparent prudery.  Later, he could see that his friend was trying to spare him heartache.  Calling to mind the little figurines Ray had made during first stay in the Cretaceous, it sunk in how terribly lonely the man must have been.  It also occurred to Nate that not only was Ray resourceful, but he was more likely a beta than an omega.  Otherwise the months of solitude would with neither medication or human contact would have left him incredibly vulnerable.

The first time Nate and Amaya made love he knew his attraction to her went beyond the physical.  He tried to act like he'd deflowered virgins before, gently and respectfully of course, but soon dropped all pretense and opened up to her. 


	3. Together and Separately

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nate and Amaya get closer. Ray and Mick fly solo.

Ray was excited to catch up with the STAR Labs team during the post-invasion victory celebration and show off all the improvements he’d made to the A.T.O.M. suit.  Once Caitlyn excused herself to chat with Martin, Cisco elbowed Ray.  “You know Heatwave, er, Mick pretty well, right?”

“Sure!  We're partners.” 

“Partners?”

Ray rolled his shoulders and chuckled nervously.  “It's a long story.  What do you want to know?”

“He's gotta be an alpha, right?” 

Ray cocked his head, wondering where Cisco was going. “I suppose so, though we've never really discussed it.  He doesn't like to make a big deal about himself.”

“Mm strong and silent's hot,” Cisco muttered, then cleared his throat.  “I mean he's got that alpha swagger can either piss me off or drive me crazy depending on the day.  Do you think he'd be up for being my heat partner?” 

Ray's eye twitched, but he managed to keep his cool.  “I'm not sure.  You'd have to ask him.  The worst he'll do is growl at you.”  

Cisco shivered.  “That's practically foreplay.  Thanks, dude.”

Ray watched his fellow geek approach Mick whose expression shifted from mild annoyance to clear interest in seconds.  There was a tiny pang in Ray's chest when he realized he hadn't seen Mick smile like that weeks.  He turned away, glancing over his shoulder in time to see Mick throw his arm around Cisco's shoulders and whisper something the younger man's ear that made him blush.  “Oh well,” Ray sighed.  Another pipe dream floating off in the steam of someone’s heat. 

 

A short while later, Sara approached Ray.  “Sickening, aren't they?” He wondered how she knew already.  Then he saw she was pointing at Oliver and Felicity.  “So damn cute,” she groaned.  He smiled.

“Dunno.  The blonde's cute but he's a little gritty for my taste.  I suppose if you like dark brooding types.”  Sara kicked his ankle playfully.

“I'm gonna head over to Star City to see my dad.  You guys are on your own for a couple days.  Think you can keep the kids from having loud parties and trashing the place?”

“Sure thing, Captain.”

 

Mick showed up a couple days later looking tired but satisfied.  Ray kept his distance.  The omega scent clinging to him wasn't unpleasant, but it belonged to Cisco, and it fed Ray's imagination the worst junk food.  He decided to take some time to himself and turned in early that night, scrolling through some adult videos he had bookmarked.   Rather than undress completely, he pushed his sleep pants down over his hips and began to tease his erection with a lubricated silicone sleeve.  

Ray knew he had only himself to blame for his current frustration.  A couple of quickies weren’t the same as finding someone with whom he could connect emotionally as well as physically.   Eyes closed tight, he called up the memory of how Kendra’s hair smelled after she had it done. He could almost feel the warmth of the sunlight streaming through the bedroom window of their Hub City apartment.   Sunday mornings were for sleeping in and making love.  He would wake her up with feather-light touches, slowly gauging the level of her interest, trying to figure out what she desired, and then doing his best to fulfill that need.  His excitement built with hers; pushing her up and over the edge, and he had the pleasure of falling with her.  As he became less sure of his place in her heart she began urging him to be rougher – to take what he needed.  One night stood out for its raw passion.  He'd been worshipping the priestess at her temple when she pushed him away both hands; her voice full of heat.  “Look at you; face all wet with me. You need this, don’t you lover?”  He nodded dumbly.  “Then take it.”  They were joined in body and soul, or so he’d thought.

No.  He wouldn't let regret taint what they’d shared, nor would he allow it to spoil his current arousal.   He called to mind his liaison with Snart.  It had been exhilarating, in the way only unplanned and ill-advised sexual activity could be.  Len made it clear he felt Ray needed to be taught a lesson for putting Mick in danger, whereas Ray was eager for a chance to forget being tortured.  He played the wide-eyed innocent as Len manhandled him in the corridor but by the time they got to Ray’s room a battle for dominance was underway.  They bit and sucked at each other’s necks; rubbing against one another frantically as the door closed.  No longer shy, Ray dropped his pants and kicked them aside.  Len stared.

“Raymond, why do you have what looks like a knot?”

“Born with it,” Ray replied simply as he set a bottle on the nightstand. 

“Since when do omegas have knots, or need lube?” Len inquired, his tone indicating both suspicion and confusion. 

“Not an omega.”  Ray began stroking himself openly; waiting for Len to make the next move.

“Change of plans, boy scout.”  Len snatched the bottle up and squirted lube onto his own fingers.  He unzipped his fly with his left hand and reached behind himself with his right.  

“You want me to top,” Ray stated casually.

“Is that going to be a problem?”

“Not like you're the first alpha to be curious.”  He undressed Len and positioned him on the bed.  “Tell me if it gets to be too much.”

Len snorted loudly.  “I'm sure I can take whatever you've got, Raymond.”

True to his word, Len handled bottoming just fine, and enjoyed it immensely judging by the moans that escaped his lips every time Ray’s hips snapped forward to press the knot tightly against his opening.  

Ray had been mortified, just for second, to find out Len had bragged to Mick.   Then, hearing how Len had spun the story, he was amused.  It was ridiculous how people lied to themselves, and their friends, rather than admit they enjoyed any type sexual activity or partner.  Ray was sure Mick wouldn’t be uptight.  He was the sort of self-possessed alpha Ray could enjoy being under and over and everywhere in between.  He sped up the pace of his strokes and finally jammed the sleeve down over his swelling knot. 

Xxx

The geek with the soft hair was just what Mick needed after punchin' aliens.  Warm and eager - a loud happy fucker.  Mick had no patience for omegas who got lame brained during their heats and needed to be coddled.  Fortunately, Ramon was the sort who knew what he wanted and had the guts to go for it.  He spent two days in the kid's apartment and hadn't bothered with clothing the entire time.  Ramon wrapped himself in a towel after showering off sweat, slick, and jizz but dropped as soon as Mick shot him a look.  One time the kid got so worked up he cried out “Heatwave!” when Mick knotted him.   Whoda thunk he had fans?  

When he came back to the ship Mick caught Haircut lookin' at him funny.  Didn't make any sense that he'd be mad about Ramon.  Omegas _could_ fuck other omegas through their heats, but the kid didn't say anything about Ray offering.  Then it hit him that it was possible Haircut might be the one lookin' for an alpha. That was a situation Mick would have to keep an eye on. 

Xxx

Amaya was used to quickly sizing up opponents and assessing difficult situations, and she was not one to let pride stand in the way of getting the job done.  She needed help.  “Nathaniel, forgive me for asking again, but why does it look like this?”  Nate stretched, yawned, and scratched his chest.  “Huh? Oh, circumcision. You know, if you keep holding it like that…ooh.” 

“You’d like me to stop?”

“I didn’t say that.” 

Amaya was curious.  “We haven’t really talked about it, but I want to understand you better.  I always believed that omegas naturally desired alphas, or at least the company of other men.” 

Nate’s body tensed until gentle kisses across his abdomen calmed him nicely.   “That’s what most people believe.  It’s not their fault, really.  All the books they gave me when I was a kid said that, and I didn’t think about it until I was about eleven years old.  It was Valentine’s Day and I realized I’d never once thought about holding hands with a boy or wanted to kiss one.  My mom was-is-awesome.  Never tried to convince me that I was confused or that I’d like guys someday.  She even found this mentorship program for young omegas and I got to talk to a couple guys like me.  Ahhh,  I’m trying to have a serious conversation and, ohhh yeah just like that.”   

xxx

Shortly after seeing his grandfather the second time, Nate decided it was high time he trusted his instincts.   The team already knew he was an omega, so he had no problem asking Sara for time off take time off for his next heat.

He wasn't sure how to tell Ray while still pretending he was “keeping it casual” with Amaya.

There was some intense hand flapping as Ray gushed, “Oh wow, you are so close.  We don't have much time.” 

“Wait, how do you even know what...”

Ray cut him off.  “You're going in to heat and you want Amaya to spend it with you, right?”

“Yeah, but...”

“And this is your first heat since you got powers so you're wondering if that will make things better or more complicated.”

“Yeah, but...”

“And given that Amaya is from 1942 and was raised to be a proper lady you're probably her first lover.”

“Yeah, but how...?”

“You’re not doing this on the ship.”

 

Ray was adamant that Nate and Amaya pack their bags and get on the jump ship. Nate managed to get a word in edgewise once they were off.  “Where the heck are we going?” “You'll see. Nah, I have to tell you.  Gideon told me about this cool hotel that caters to heat slash rut getaways.”

Amaya giggled and covered her mouth, looking slightly scandalized.  “Where is it?”

“2263 - oh you said where not when.  It's in the middle of the desert.  What's outside the hotel isn't important.  It's the place itself.  State of the art scent-blocking technology, sound-proofed rooms, and the biggest beds. You're gonna love it.”

 

Ray wasn't kidding.  From the blast furnace of the desert they stepped into the fanciest place Nate had ever seen, and he'd been to Versailles circa 1682.  After checking in at the front desk, Amaya went to check out their suite while Ray took Nate aside.  “Look, you’ll probably be fine.  But just in case I brought a whole med kit with clotting factors, plasma replacement, and extra socks.”

Nate stood there with his mouth hanging open, blown away by Ray’s thorough planning.  “You are seriously amazing.  What are you gonna do while I'm, um, busy?”

Ray accepted a palm-sized tablet from the desk clerk and began examining what looked like a list of names.  “Huh? The thing is that folks are much more open in the 23rd century.  This is a list of couples looking for a - never mind, go have fun. Call me if you need me.”

xxx

When Nate's heat  came around Ray was excited for him, knowing he wanted to share the experience with Amaya.  Ray sensed it as soon as he woke up that morning; something tickling his olfactory system.  By lunchtime his skin was tingling.  Alphas and betas could often detect oncoming heat, and Ray had discovered in college that being near omegas at the beginning of their cycles filled him with a wondrous feeling of desire. 

He already knew where he would take the couple.  Ray felt little bit guilty, encouraging them when he knew they didn’t have a future together, but he just couldn't resist a love story.  After he wished Nate good luck, Ray checked into his own room and breathed a sigh of relief.   The hotel’s entertainment feeds carried everything from educational programming and romance to explicit live shows.  He channel surfed for a while, letting the tension build as he touched himself lazily through his clothes.  Then he dimmed the lights, got naked, and drifted on the wings of his arousal.  He got out the lubricant made to approximate omega slick and applied a liberal amount both to himself and one of the toys provided in the suite.  It was a nice length with a moderately sized knot; perfect for loosening up.  He inserted it slowly, recalling pleasant memories of his first few sexual partners.  In college he’d enjoyed being mounted by eager young alphas looking to practice their bedroom skills.  Ray became an expert at preparing himself in the dark.  He encouraged his partners to try out their sweet talk; to call him a pretty omega and say how good he smelled.  Their thrusts became erratic as they rushed eagerly to experience tying for the short  time it lasted at their age. Ray worked the dildo in deeper, nudging the head against his special place.  He laughed quietly at the wording of the old book his mother had given him when he turned thirteen; an introduction to mating and bonding for omegas.  “ _Omegas have a special place inside them that when touched by an alpha feels very good and makes mating a wonderful experience for both of you_.” 

After the first surgery he'd been terrified they'd taken it away from him.   Would anyone still want him for their mate?  Fortunately, Ray got to keep his prostate, and, at the moment, it was feeling very special indeed.  He pulled his legs up to his chest, working against the remaining tightness until his body got the point and stretched to accommodate the bulge at the base.  He moaned out loud as the orgasm erupted from deep within him.  Shaking and spasming, he rode out the aftershocks. When it was done he squished a pillow against his chest and drifted off; deeply satisfied. 

Two hours later he cleaned up and met a couple for dinner.  Cal and Gunnar were celebrating the thirty-fifth anniversary of their bonding.  Gunnar had just had knee-replacement surgery and was worried he wouldn't be able to handle Cal's heat by himself.   Cal was a gruff-looking man with a weathered face and callused hands who explained, somewhat annoyed, that he couldn't take suppressants due their interaction with his blood pressure medication.   He’d wanted to tough it out at home, but Gunnar convinced him to take a long overdue vacation and maybe try something new.   Ray let them know he was glad to help however he could. 

xxx

Despite his best efforts to be chill, Nate was on pins and needles.  He scrubbed himself pink in the shower and emerged from the bathroom to find Amaya poking through the bottom drawer of the night stand.  “They've provided...accessories?”  She held up a large purple double-headed phallus wrapped in plastic, staring at it in fascination and horror.  Nate took it gently from her hand and put it back in the drawer. 

“We aren't going to need that,” he stated confidently.  “Uh, we haven't really talked about that much, but I guess we should.”  He sat on the bed and Amaya joined him. 

“About accessories?”  she asked, clearly teasing.

“About me and, um, butt stuff.”  Nate felt like a kid again as his mom was explaining where babies came from.  “The thing is that I don't really like it...very much.  When I'm in heat I get kinda loopy and I wiggle my rear sometimes when I’m excited.  But I don't want stuff shoved up there.”   

“Nathaniel I would never want you make you uncomfortable, or cause you pain, during lovemaking.  You can stop me any time.  Let's just see what happens?”

He kissed her lips sweetly.  “I apologize in advance for my language.  Sometimes I swear.”

She clutched her totem as if it were a strand of pearls.  “How shocking, Doctor Heywood.” 

Nate's pulse quickened.  “I don't know why it sounds dirty when you talk like that.” 

Amaya flashed a wicked grin.  “I don't know either, Doctor Heywood.  I suppose I shouldn't tell you that I don't have anything on under this robe; no brassiere, no stockings, no bloomers.” 

Nate grinned.  “And your ankles are showing. It's indecent.”  He trailed his fingertips across her collarbone and kissed her neck.  Loosening the belt of her robe, Amaya gave him access to her upper body and Nate began to kiss her more urgently while cupping her left breast and running his thumb over the nipple.  “You make me so damn hard,” he groaned.  Boldly, Amaya cupped the growing bulge in his towel.  The sweet friction of terry cloth against his erection made him moan.  She whipped the towel away, making him gasp. 

“If I may?”

“Be my guest.”

Nate knew he would probably ejaculate from her gentle exploratory strokes alone, but the nice thing about being in heat was he could probably rise to the occasion again fairly soon.  “I-I want. I want to use my mouth on you again if that's all right.  Wow, I really should be able to say it if I want to do it. You make me feel so good I can’t think.”   Amaya seemed pleased by that knowledge. 

“I would like that,” she admitted softly.  “Though perhaps I should see what you taste like as well.” 

“Ohhhh God.”  A few short licks up his shaft and across the head of his cock were all it took.  Nate put his hand up to shield her face the semen pulsed out of him.  Grabbing a towel from the stack he'd placed next to the bed, he cleaned up and then eagerly pushed Amaya onto her back and dove between her legs to press his tongue between her folds.  She flopped back onto the mattress.  “Nathaniel!”

 

Time had meaning and the world outside Amaya's pleasure ceased to exist for Nate.  Her moans and alternating pleas for him to stop and never stop were all he could hear.  He got up on his knees and pulled her up onto his thighs only so he could bend himself in half and fit his mouth to her sex.  She wrapped her legs around his upper arms and screamed, hands scrabbling in the sheets.  Gasping for breath he let her drop and then took hold of himself.  He was lost in his own need and pumped his swollen cock with abandon.  “Fuck, I'm gonna-” This time there was no protecting her from his issue, but she didn't seem upset. 

He shut his eyes and panted, waiting for his brain to stop buzzing.  He felt her touch, but it was weird, like his skin had become less sensitive.  With one eye open he saw Amaya running her fingertips along his shiny metallic penis.  “Oh.  That's interesting,” he managed to say before he flopped onto his side and soon fell asleep.

xxx

As Nate's heat wound down, Amaya took a break to lounge by the pool and bask in the sun, filtered through UV blocking coated glass.  She saw Ray bid farewell to an older couple and then do a few laps before stretching out on a chair next to her.  “Thank you for this, Ray,” she said, deeply contented.  “It means a great deal to Nathaniel – and me.”

“You're welcome.  It's the least I can do for my friends.” Removing her sunglasses, Amaya turned to him and spoke earnestly.  “I owe you an apology.  When I first met you all I judged everyone much too quickly, but you especially.  I regret the unkind things I said.”

Ray's lopsided smile let her know she'd already been forgiven.  “We're not an easy bunch to get along with.” 

“Mick is a challenge all his own,” she agreed.  “But you, Ray, you're unlike any alpha I've ever met.”  He opened his mouth to speak, then let her continue.  “After being in the JSA I thought I knew it all.  I was so sure of myself and my mission.  My world view didn’t include people like you, and Mick, Sara, Jefferson, Martin and even Nathaniel.  You've shown me that there is more than one way to be a hero.” 

xxx

Mick Rory knew he could be intimidating - at times downright scary.  Still, he didn't practice menacing looks in a mirror, so having a staring contest with his own dark blue eyes was a little freaky.  Before the two groups of Legends went out to try to destroy the spear for a second time, Mick ran into his future self.  “Guess we didn't fix everything,” Mick observed weakly.  Future-Mick snarled at him.  “Listen up, asshole.  If you somehow manage not to get yourself killed today you have one job: keep Thawne away from Ray.”

“What’s that freak want with Haircut?”

“I said listen, not ask stupid questions.  He never touches Ray again.”

“All right. You got it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I owe thanks for other fic writers for the ideas that Thawne might have a weird fixation on Ray. Also, for the head cannon that Mick may be able to remember bits of the Doomworld timeline.


	4. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things take a turn after the team breaks time, splits up, and reforms. Spoilers for Season 3

In Aruba nightmares were as regular as the tides.  Mick blamed the first couple on cheap tequila and began insisting on middle shelf.   Then he realized that the dreams were actually memories; leftovers from a different life.  It was eerily similar to how he was able to remember his old life when he was Chronos; fragmented and fleeting images were interspersed with bursts of emotion.  Stuff like that could ruin a whole day of drinkin' and doin' nothing.  The worst rolled him out of bed onto the floor, drenched in cold sweat and gasping for breath.  He'd been in STAR labs, but Ramon wasn't there.  Thawne came out of some freaky mad science room wearing a surgical gown and bloody latex gloves.  Mick could see Ray, unconscious and strapped to a gurney.  Thawne looked too pleased with himself.  “Don’t worry, Mister Rory.  He’ll wake up shortly and remember nothing.  I simply wanted a closer examination of such an interesting specimen.  Took these out of him just now.”  In his hand he held two oval-shaped blobs streaked with gore. 

Mick ran his head under the faucet until the image faded and his stomach stopped doing barrel rolls.  His future self’s warning rang in his ears.  Mick vowed to kill Thawne as many times as necessary to prevent Ray from ending up in that horror show.

Xxx

Once they got Julius Caesar back where he belonged everyone set about making themselves at home again on the Waverider.  Ray and Nate were stocking the kitchen.  “You know, you could have called me when Amaya left.  It’s not like I would have said I told you so.”  

Nate ran his fingers through his hair.  “I know, man.  It was so sudden and I guess I’m still trying to process it.  I’ll be okay.  What about you – weren’t you seeing a guy you worked with?”

Ray turned away to put some sprouts in the fridge.  “He dumped me.”

“That sucks. What happened?” 

“There was a guy in accounting who wanted a heat partner.”

“He left you for that?” 

“Yeah I guess he really wanted to rut and since I don’t have heats.  Turns out he’s one of those neo-traditional alphas that believe they have to have an omega mate to fulfill their purpose or whatever.”

“What an asshole; stringing you along like that.  You know, speaking for omegas, you are just as hot as us.”  Ray snorted.

“Thanks, buddy. You know, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about…”

 

“Hey Nate!”  Jax clapped him on the back. “Didn’t I see “Steel - proud omega super hero” trending last month.” 

Nate beamed.  “Yeah, it was pretty sweet. Me and Wal-Kid Flash-make a good team.”

“How about you use your amazing strength to help me lift some battery backups into place.”

“Sure thing. Catch you later, Ray?”

“Yeah, Nate, no problem.”

 

Ray stopped by the med bay and found Mick and Sara getting everything squared away.    “Hey Haircut, wanna supervise my nose getting’ fixed?  I dunno if it needs to go left or right.”  He moved the cartilage from side to side in a way that made Ray queasy. 

“Maybe it should go up,” Sara suggested.

Mick nodded.  “That does feel more intuitive.” 

Ray’s grimaced.  “I hate you both.”

Xxx

“I hear you’re the one with control problems these days,” Mick teased Amaya. She smiled ruefully. 

“Unfortunately.  It’s extremely disconcerting.”

“Speaking of people being pissed off, which is what I think ya meant to say, what’s the deal with Pretty?”

She sighed.  “I had to break it off.  It was time for me to go back where I belong.”

“Mmm.  Is that so?  He didn’t take it well when you told ‘im?”

She looked at the floor.  “I’m afraid I didn't explain myself, or say goodbye.”  

Mick raised an eyebrow.  “Ah, well, as long as you had a good reason. I always had reasons every time I've run away."

“I didn’t run away from Nathaniel.  I returned to my life; to fulfill my destiny.”

“Whatever you say.”

xxx 

Nate said Mick was doing okay after meeting his dad in Vietnam so Ray wasn’t sure if he should let him be alone or keep him talking.  He saved Mick some pecan pie and placed it next to a six-pack of Schlitz in the fridge with a note;  _If you want to talk, my door is open._   By midnight Ray had fallen asleep, and no one woke him.

xxx

The second time the Legends teamed up with other heroes to save the world did not have a happy ending.  “Dammit, I'm fine,” Mick shouted as he shook Ray off. 

“I'm just wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt.”

“I can’t handle your fussin’ right now.”  He threw his heat gun aside and clenched his fists. 

“I'm really scared for both Martin and Jax,” Ray confessed with a subtle tilt of his head.

“Look, they're both tough.  Let Gideon do her thing.”

Ray's right shoulder dropped as he clearly bared his neck.   “Quit it,” Mick ordered with a low rumble.   “You ain't **mine**!”

Ray's insides froze.  “I’m sorry Mick.  I just – I’m sorry.”

“Bah!” Mick turned and stalked off. 

 

It felt awful letting Mick walk away, but Ray forced himself to stop following.  He went to store his suit and then paced, unable to calm down.  Sara came by shortly, checking on everyone as there was nothing she could do about the grim situation in the med bay.  Ray flinched when she stuck her head in the room.  “Hey, are you okay?”

He let out a frightened whine and swore in frustration.  “Dammit! I can't stop.”  Arms wrapped tightly around himself, Ray began rocking back on his heels.  “I'll be fine in a minute.”

“Can I come over there?”  He nodded.  Sara crossed the room and put a cool hand on the back of his neck which allowed him to take a deep breath begin to calm down. 

“I'm not your problem any more than I am his.”

“You're not my problem.  You're my friend.”  He thanked her and let her continue on her way.  They would all need comforting soon enough.

 

That night Ray stole a dirty shirt from the laundry room and took it to the fabricator.  “Gideon, can you extract the scent from this and make more of it in liquid form?”

“Certainly, Doctor Palmer.”  Shame-faced, Ray returned to his quarters and doused a fleece blanket with the smoky blend.  He was finally able to rest. 

Xxx

The team was gathered in the library tidying up after the latest disaster and Zari picked up a trio of books.  “Oh wow, I've heard of these.”  Ray ran his fingers along the spines and smiled.

“ _Strong Alpha, Special Omega,_ and _Kind Beta_. My mom gave me the whole set.  I read them over and over.”

Nate launched into the history of the federally funded study that had resulted in the publishing and distribution of the books while Mick took a beer break.

Zari shook her head.  “Weren't they a little outdated, even when you guys were kids?”

Sara's huffed in mock offense.  “You sayin' we're old? Yeah, they’re old fashioned, but it was cool knowing my folks had read them too. Now, Rory probably had first editions.”

Mick snorted.  “Didn't need books.  Just my Gran.”

“And what sort of advice did you get?” Nate inquired.

“Don't jump on the Omega and scare him to death.”  Zari laughed.  Nate and Sara began discussing the difference in their respective bird and bees talks while Ray sat on the floor and flipped through the pages looking nostalgic.  Zari sat next to him.  “Need a refresher?” she teased.

“Just remembering when things were simpler,” he replied.  “When you're a kid you think adults have it all figured out.  These books felt like a road map to becoming a grown up.”

“You have a special relationship with books, huh?”

“Never been stood up by a book,” Ray joked.  Zari smiled and let him point out meaningful passages.

 

In the wee hours of the morning Zari came to get Sara from her quarters.  “Ray needs help,” she insisted.  Ray was in the library staring at a nearly empty bottle of wine.  Sara understood Zari’s concern.  She'd never known Ray to drink just to get drunk.   “Are you celebrating something, or trying to forget?” 

“I miss Anna,” Ray replied, his voice hoarse.  “I try hard not to, but I think I’m gonna be alone forever.”   He covered his face with his hands.  Sara and Zari helped him stand.  Zari gave his arm a squeeze.  “Come big guy.  Time for bed.  Things will look brighter in the morning.” 

They got him into bed and Zari was covering him with a blanket when Mick stopped in front of the open doorway.  Ray caught sight of him and hurled a book in his direction.  “Stop looking at me like that!”

“Like what?” Mick seemed genuinely confused. 

“Like you’re better'n me cuz you don't need annnybody.”

Zari scooted out of the room while Sara tried to calm Ray.  “Hey, he's just concerned about you.”  She shot Mick a look and mouthed 'please don't argue with me now'.  Mick just shrugged.

xxx 

Mick watched Ray sleep fitfully, curled up awkwardly in the treatment chair.  “M’sorry, Haircut,” he whispered and made his exit only to run into Amaya in the corridor. 

“You should stay,” she suggested.  “He’d like it if you did.”  Vigorous head shaking commenced.    

“Don’t need me botherin’ him while he’s tryin’ to rest.  My fault anyway.”

“Mick, it is not.”

"What's this totem thing doin' to me?  I can feel it in my gut."

"It's part of you now.  I told you, you're worthy."

"M'not!  Don't deserve...can't even protect...I gotta go."

 

Ray woke to find that he was still in the med bay and not being torn to pieces by a demonic entity.  “How am I doing, Gideon?”   

“Your injuries have healed Doctor Palmer, but I must apologize.  I am unable to repair the ruptured implants as they are technically not part of your body.  I was able to mitigate the effects of silicone leakage, but you should consult a qualified professional soon.”

“Not exactly time for that right now,” Ray muttered.  “And not important if Mallus escapes.”

 Amaya limped in.  “Nice to see you awake.  How are you feeling?

“Not sure,” he replied honestly. 

“Ray, I didn't intend to invade your privacy, but I happened to see your body scans while Gideon was working on you.”

“Bound to happen eventually.  I'd appreciate your discretion.”

“Of course,” Amaya assured him. “I can’t help but think  back to when you gave Nate the serum.  You must have hoped that it would repair some of the damage.”

Ray swallowed hard.  “You're wrong.  Yes, I wanted to be strong so that I didn't have to rely on the suit, but I wasn't thinking about my situation.  I've never been ashamed of what I am, and I'd give that serum to Nate again in a heartbeat.”

“Because you _are_ a hero,” Amaya said, reaching for his hand.  “You saved a life and gave me the chance to know love, for as long as it might last.”

Biting his lip, Ray looked sad. “Amaya, I can't tell you or Nate how to live your lives.  You both deserve to be happy - to know love.  But you have to see that the longer this goes on the more it is going to hurt both of you.”

“I know, Ray.  I really do. I keep telling myself I don't have to think about it today, but the day will come, and soon.  I know you'll be there for him because you're a good friend.”

“I'm your friend too; always will be.  Um, since you're here, can you help me with an injection? I think I’m due for another one.  Same dosage, Gideon?”

“Yes, Doctor Palmer.  Miss Jiwe, the syringe is in the second drawer from the bottom.”

xxx 

Ray plopped down on the beach and began construction on a new tower.  Mick had to give him grief.  “Haircut, everybody's off doin' stuff and you're here playin' in the sand.”

“Building sand castles _is_ fun,” Ray insisted.  “And I have to rebuild this section because someone spilled his mai tai.”

“I swear that was an accident.”

“Yeah well I'm putting in a moat to contain future accidents.  Besides, you've just been sitting here all day.  That doesn’t exactly count as an activity.”

“I'm more of a nighttime fun kinda guy.”

“I'll remind you of that when you're still here at sunset.”

“Just sayin' there's plenty of tail to chase.  Even the new kid's at the bar.” 

“I'm good.” 

Mick hmph’d skeptically.  “Where were ya yesterday?”

Ray reached for his pina colada.  “Had to get something taken care of, medically.”

Mick tried to seem casual with his questioning. “You all right?”

Ray rubbed the back of his neck.  “Yeah, like I said, I'm good.”

Nate arrived, sat opposite Ray and began constructing his own castle.  They worked in silence for a few minutes and then Ray tried to address the elephant that had gone back to Zambezi.  “I know it hurt to say goodbye.  You and Amaya were good together.”

"Yeah, it was somethin' else,” Nate replied ruefully.   "Life lesson I suppose."

“You can't ignore your heart.  I once told someone that having a broken heart was good because it meant you were still capable of love.”

Nate rolled his eyes.  “You believe that crap?”

“Hell no.  Are you kidding me?"   Mick interjected.  “When he said it he was tryin' not to ugly cry in front of the whole team.” 

Nate didn’t know how to react to that until Ray laughed. “He's not wrong.  At the time I was trying to keep it together after losing another mate.  I wanted to sound brave.  It is sort of true, though.  Now are you gonna back off on your expansion or am I going to have to build a sand siege machine?”

“Manifest destiny, man.  My people need room to grow.”

“Your people are going end up my subjects.”

“We rebel against tyranny, Sir Raymond.”

Mick muttered something about “dorks” and gave in to the urge to nap again.


	5. Exposed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter takes place in a hypothetical time between Seasons 3 and 4

After the team dropped off Wally they stopped by Nate's mom's house as her basement had become the official Legends clubhouse.   As usual, Mrs. Heywood made a big fuss and sent them off with as much homemade goodies as they could carry.  On the walk back to the ship Nate noticed that Ray looked tense.  “Sorry my mom got nosy.  Apparently she's more worried about you being happily mated than me.  Thanks for keeping her off my back.” Ray shrugged, and Mick feigned shock.

“She's not worried about me?”

Zari laughed.  “She thinks you’re a lost cause.  She's afraid you'll end up an alpha spinster.”

Mick grinned.  “Long as she keeps the sandwiches coming she can worry all she wants.”

 

Out of the corner of his eye Nate saw a tall yellow-haired man moving on a path that would intercept theirs.  “Palmer!”  He shouted Ray's surname like it was both an accusation and a declaration of war.  Ray stopped in his tracks and clenched his fists.  Everyone seemed to be waiting until Ray let them know if they needed to intervene.  As the man continued to approach rapidly Ray began to look more and more angry.

“Stop! That's 100 feet, Mark.  I _will_ call the police.” 

The man sneered.  “The restraining order expired, Palmer, and I doubt you have lawyers on retainer any more.” 

Ray groaned. “How long are you going to do this, Mark? It's been almost ten years.” 

Nate looked from Mick to Sara, hoping they could fill him in, but their expressions told him they were as clueless as he.  

“As long as it takes for you to admit you screwed me over,” Mark fumed.

Ray looked royally pissed off.  “So the rest of our lives then?  Because I have nothing to apologize for.  I met Kristopher the day he broke off the engagement.”

Mark, who was clearly capable of holding a grudge for more than a decade, began to rant and rave.  “He was my omega! You had no right.”  Nate frowned.  He hated when people talked about omegas like they possessions, and it appeared that Ray agreed with the sentiment.

“You can't own another person or control their feelings.  Kris wanted to be with me. End of story.”

 

To say that things got ugly was putting it lightly.  Mark took a small step backward, smiling cruelly.   “Hey, I know a couple stories.  Maybe your pals would like to hear them.  Which one of you is he screwing?”  He looked over at Nate.  “You maybe.  Tell me, does he ask you to lie to him when you’re in bed?”

Ray took a swing at the jerk, his fist glancing off Mark's cheekbone before he was restrained by both Sara and Nate. 

Mark was red-faced and screamed, “He was mine!  Omegas belong with alphas, not neutered freaks like you!” 

 

Ray wasn't backing down.  Eyes ablaze with fury he started shouting over Zari who had stepped between the two men.  "You don't deserve any omega.  It was your abusive behavior that drove Kris away.  Maybe if you knew how to treat a mate he wouldn't have been so eager to take _my_ knot.”  Mark charged, forcing Mick to grab the guy in a bear hug and throw him in a nearby hedge while the others pulled Ray along.  Ray shook them all off and stalked back to the Waverider.

 

Half an hour later with the ship underway, folks were in the galley puzzling over the confrontation.  “I'm confused," Zari was the first to admit.  "Was Ray saying he had a knot?  I didn't think he was an alpha."  

Nate was equally bewildered.  “Maybe he meant it metaphorically.  I swear he's beta.”

“He was serious,” Mick attested.  “Haircut doesn't posture.  He was really feelin’ it.”

Sara entered the room with Ray in tow.  He went to a corner, well away from the rest of the group, and slouched against the wall.  He spoke up, trying to sound upbeat.  “Sorry about that, guys. I forgot to renew the restraining order.  He pops up every so often to-”

“Be an asshole?” Nate offered.

“Pretty much. I had a brief relationship with his ex.  Mark refuses to acknowledge that Kris had dumped him and blames me for breaking them up. He hates me.”

“You don't have to explain yourself, Ray," Sara said.  "But if there's anything you want to get off your chest, we're here to listen.”   

“I want to tell you guys.  You're my family, and I don't like hiding stuff from you.  I usually handle run-ins with Mark without losing my cool, but I get a little keyed up sometimes after an injection. I've thought about switching to the creams, but worry about touch transfer.”

“Time out,” Zari called.  “Injection?”

Ray pulled up his left sleeve to display the bruise on his deltoid. 

“Intramuscular?” Mick asked.  Ray nodded. 

Nate was aghast.  “Are you using steroids?”

“Essentially. It's testosterone. I need it because of my condition.”

Mick started popping caps off bottles of beer and passing them around.  “You an omega or what?” he demanded.

Ray looked away briefly.  “Or what,” he said quietly.  “People like me don't have a designation.  There aren't that many of us, and until recently we didn't survive to adulthood.  I'm a genetic anomaly.  You know our physiology isn't just a matter of just what's in our DNA, but gene expression; what gets turned on as we're developing in utero. I was born with aspects of both alphas and omegas.”

“So you’re a super beta?” Zari theorized.

“I wish.  I had a normal childhood; notwithstanding an attempt to keep an alien as a pet.  Then I hit puberty, or rather, it hit me.  When my body started pumping out hormones my system went into shock.  Birth scans had shown I was omega, but when I got sick further testing revealed the complexity of the situation.”

“How did they fix it?”  Nate inquired.  “I mean, obviously you're alive.” 

“The doctors did what they could to stabilize me and slow down the abnormal cell growth.  They started by taking out my omega organs.  The benefits were temporary.”  He reached out for one of the beers; gulping down liquid courage.

“I was okay for almost a year, but things got bad again.  Mark called me neutered because that's pretty much what happened to remove the malignant tissue.  Some of the medications they gave me stunted my ability to make pheromones.  Eventually things calmed down and I could finish maturing, but I still have to take testosterone or I can't, um, do guy stuff.  And since I'm laying all out there: No, I don't go through heat or rut. And, yes, I have a knot.  Thanks for not freaking out.”

Nate gave him a friendly smile.  “What are friends for?  Hell, I didn't have a proper heat until college, and I wasn't every sure I would ever fall in love until I met Amaya.”

Mick sniffed.  “Can't mark or share scent cuz of the burns. Nobody's perfect.”

Sara grinned.  “I think we know I'm messed up regardless of my biology.”

Zari sighed.  “I guess I'm the only normal one.”  

“You don't eat bacon,” Mick pointed out.  “That ain't normal.”

Zari groaned. "Do we have to go over this again?"

"Nah, I get it. You're not Jewish or somethin'.

Ray smiled and accepted hugs and fist bumps.

xxx

A couple days later, after watching the latest Star Wars movie, Nate tried to touch base with Ray. “You know you're my bro, right?”

“Yeah Nate. Bffs and all that. What's on your mind?”

“Kinda worried about you.”

“I'm fine.”

“Are you? You say you are, and you seem to be in a better place since the big reveal, but you're still really tense.  Look, I've been reading stuff about conditions like yours.  I haven't found anything that says testosterone supplementation makes you aggro, which means maybe there's some other reason you wanted to beat that Mark guy to a pulp.”

Ray sighed.  “You're right.  I was terrified when Mark started talking about stuff he found out about me and Kris. He hired a private investigator to follow us, and record our conversations.  I managed to get the them destroyed, but Mark had already heard.”  He swallowed hard.  “I asked Kris to call me _alpha_ when we were intimate.  I didn't lie to him, or anyone I've been with.  I know it's pretend. It’s just nice to feel sort of normal.”

“Dude I steel up when I get super turned on. Nobody has the right to criticize what you do in bed.”

“If he'd told everyone that I would have been so humiliated. I lost my temper.”

“You know you haven't taken a day off in a while.  Maybe you need some time in the desert.” Nate winked.

“I know what you mean, Nate, and I appreciate the concern. Just don't feel like it right now.”

“We've gone over what a crap liar you are lately, right?”

“Fine.  I do feel like that.  I would love to go to the desert, but I'm afraid.”

“How come?” 

Scratching his head, Ray mumbled, “Don't want anyone to see me naked.”

“Dude, I've seen you naked dozens of times. Don’t recall seeing anything shocking. It's not like Mick's, you know.  But that's just a lot of...not the point here.”

“Yeah, don't get side-tracked because seriously it's- like you said, not the point.  I had testicular implants put in when I was in college so I could look normal.  Last year after various beatings one of them ruptured and the other was leaking.  They had to come out.  I couldn't decide what kind to have put in and then I thought I was confident enough that I didn't need them anymore.  Only now I think I should have done it, even if they wouldn't feel the same as my old silicone ones.”

Nate blinked.  “I'm sure it's not that bad.  Do you want to...”

“I'm not showing you my junk, Nate. Just take my word for it that any guy would notice right away. It's hard enough that I feel everyone looks at me differently now.”

“Ohhh, I get it.”

“Get what?”

“See, you think I'm not listening, but I am.  You said you like big, excuse me, physically imposing, alphas.  You think _Mick_ looks at you differently now.”

“Fine, yes that's what I meant.  I used to think that maybe he might, someday...it was a harmless fantasy.  There was chemistry, but neither of us ever acted on it.   Now when he looks at me all he sees is damaged goods.  What's an alpha like Mick want with that?”


	6. Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are about to get dirty in the best possible way.

Trips to prehistory always threw Nate for a loop.  There was no way to establish a geographical frame of reference and he was unable to ground himself with his knowledge of significant dates.  While there were no dinosaurs this time around, there was plenty of plant life to be avoided while they gathered the one herb they'd been tasked with gathering.  According to Constantine, yestricaria  could not be found after the 18th century, and finding something uncontaminated by pollution from the industrial revolution would make its effects more potent so off to the Cenozoic they went.  When Ray got distracted by the antics of the small primates in the nearby trees Nate was especially grateful for Mick's presence.    Looking a bit tense, Mick swept the heat gun from side to side, ready to torch anything that looked at him funny.  He sneezed and a small gecko paid the ultimate price.  Nate yipped and called out to Ray.  “Hey caveman, you hungry?”

Ray chuckled.  “Looks overcooked. Maybe next time.  I think we’ve got enough to use and get some new plants potted. Let’s go get Mick some tissues.” 

The sniffing continued on board the ship as they tossed their disposable coveralls in the incinerator.  Zari came down to inspect their harvest.

“You okay, Mick?  You look a little pink.”

Mick frowned.  “What's that smell?”

Zara took a deep breath.  “I don't smell anything unusual,” she reported.  Mick stepped closer to Nate. 

“Why do you smell weird?”

“I don’t,” Nate protested.  “Check Ray.”

“Haircut smells like he’s s'posed to.” Mick’s gaze remained fixed on Nate, who was starting to get uncomfortable.

“Honestly, can't a guy try a new cologne without everyone being a critic?”

 “Told you not to go cheap,” Ray noted.  “Breaks down into alcohols faster. Uh, Mick?”

Nate's personal space was breached as Mick buried his face in Nate’s hair.  “Do I play dead?” he squeaked to Ray and Zari.   

Mick pulled back and grimaced.  “Tomasz, get Pretty outta here. Somethin’ ain’t right.” Nate and Zari made a hasty retreat while Ray escorted Mick to the med bay and asked Gideon to have Sara to meet them there.

 

In less than a minute Gideon delivered a verdict.  “It appears that Mister Rory is in the early stages of rut.”

“You scented Nate,” Ray surmised.  “Even with blockers and suppressants.  That's unusual.”

Gideon interjected.  “Mister Rory is not currently taking any suppressant medication.”

Sara's eyebrows crept upward,  “Is there a reason for that?” 

Mick scowled.  “Been forever since I needed 'em.  Thought I was done.  Started feeling weird soon as we got out in that green junk.”

“Interesting," Gideon remarked  "According to my records the leaves of the yestricara, of which you retrieved several mature plants, were used as sexual _enhancements_ by some cultures.  It is very likely the cause of Mister Rory's current condition.”

“I swear if Constantine sent us just to get him aphrodisiacs,” Sara groaned.

"Fear not, Captain Lance.  I examined the rituals that Mister Constantine spoke of and confirmed the necessity of the plant before I set course for the current location."

 

“Can you stop it, Gideon?” Mick inquired.   

“I'm afraid not, Mister Rory.”

“Just lock me in my room then.”

“We could take you somewhere you could find someone,” Sara offered. 

“Do I look like I'm in any shape to find a date?”  Indeed, Mick's skin was taking on a reddish cast and he looked more irritable than usual.  Alphas in rut were not known for their patience.

Sara persisted.  “There are professionals.”

“No hookers.”

Ray tried a gentler approach.  “Not prostitutes, Mick.  There are people trained to help alphas.”

Mick was gritting his teeth.  “Been too long, and it's comin' on strong.  I'm liable to hurt someone.  Best just tough it out on my own.”

Sara leaned in and rubbed her forehead. 

Mick growled at her.  “Doncha think you're standin' a little close?”  The threat behind his words was clear. 

“She’s just trying to help,” Ray remarked.  He reached out to touch Mick's arm only to find himself grappled and pulled against the other man's chest.  “Whoa-oh-okay.”  Ray grasped Mick's shoulders to keep his balance and was treated to a heated stubble-covered cheek against his neck.  He was breathing heavily.

“Why d'you always smell so damn good?”

“Miiiick?” Sara's tone was one of concern more than anger.

Ray was quick to speak up in Mick’s defense. “It's fine, Sara.  He’d never hurt me.”  The certainty with which he spoke was touching. For his part, Mick wrapped his arms around the scientist's waist and nuzzled his neck. 

“Thass right.  Never hurt you, beautiful,” he mumbled. 

Sara made an executive decision.  “Gideon, knock him out."  Mick slumped back and Ray extricated himself just as Nate popped in, drenched in pheromone blockers and Drakkar Noir.

“I have a plan!” he announced. 

Sara looked at him skeptically. “You're gonna take one for the team?”

“Ewwww, no.  I was going to suggest we take him to the desert, and since he's already sedated he can't argue."

"All right.  You two are responsible for him."  

 

Working together Ray and Nate got Mick onto the jump ship.  It turned out that booking a room for an unconscious person only required a larger security deposit.  Mick woke up safely removed from the public, disoriented and pissed off.  “Where are we?”

“It's a hotel,” Nate replied. “We wanted to give you a nice place for you know.”

“What does the décor have to do with anything?  I seem to recall tellin’ people I can handle it.”  Nate wasn’t sure how to make the situation sound better than it was. 

“Isn’t this better than being trapped in one cramped room? There's a jacuzzi tub, porn, amazing room service.” 

Mick began to stalk around the perimeter of the suite muttering to himself.  “He brought you and Amaya here.  Probably comes here by himself. ”  

Thrown off by the sudden personal nature of Mick’s grumbling, Nate wasn't sure what to say.  "Yes, this is where Ray brought me to spend my heat with Amaya.  It was really special.”

Mick glared.  “That's great.  Didja miss the part where I'm mate-less.  Nothin’ special ‘bout that.  I need booze.”   Once he’d located the mini-bar, he began downing small bottles of liquor.  “Stupid hormones make me talk-y,” he explained, clearly embarrassed.    

Nate wanted to keep him talking.  “Uh lots of people come here just to hook up.  You could find someone, or several someones, you’re compatible with.  Ray's getting the list”

Mick threw a bottle into the sink and groaned when it bounced instead of shattering.  “Is that what he did?  Find _someone_?   Got no business goin’ off with strangers when he coulda just said.”

Finally the bulb above Nate’s head lit up and he rapidly reevaluated the situation. “Are you mad that Ray for not telling us – you- about himself?”

“Wasn't any of my business,” Mick asserted, massaging his temples.  “Thought he was omega the way he acted.  Figured all I had ta do was wait till he needed me.  I tried to be better – for the team.  It's important to him that people do good.  But he never, ‘cuz I was wrong.  Wasn't makin' me wait.  He just don't want me.” 

 

Nate felt awful that he'd never realized Mick had such strong feelings for Ray.  “Hell buddy, why didn't you tell him how you feel?” 

The perpetually stoic man choked up.  “Not how it works.  Mate's supposed to find me.  Gotta be patient.  Don’t scare ‘em off.”  He stopped talking, and seemed to be trying to catch his breath when he turned his back to Nate.  “You need to go.  I can smell you again.  Don't come back.”  Mick retreated to the bathroom. 

 

As soon as Nate stepped out into the hallway he bumped into Ray who was carrying a bag and a tablet.  “How's he doing?”

“Not great,” Nate replied honestly.  “He's pissed, but that’s not even half of it.  He said some stuff.”

“He didn't mean it, Nate.  You know he gets meaner when he’s scared.” 

Nate chuckled.  “Yeah, I do, and so do you. I mean, you know him so well.   The whole way here I wanted to ask - what are you waiting for?  I know you want to be with him.  What’s the hold up?”

Ray's eyes were wide and sad. “That's not...I can't...he doesn't.” 

Nate held up his hands.  “Let me make this clear.  You can, and he does.  I just had an honest to God _moment_ with Mick Rory and if you care about him like I think you do you'll go in there and be completely honest.  It’s now or never.  Forget about what comes later.  You can give me that list.  He needs you; no substitutes.” 

xxx

Trying to process what Nate had said, Ray entered the room cautiously.  On cue the other man emerged from the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.  He caught sight of Ray clutching a bag and sneered.  “Get outta here and take the freaky sex toys with you.”  He went to the bar and opened another bottle.

“You shouldn’t drink when you’re in rut,” Ray admonished. 

“Only matters if I gotta worry about someone else, which I don't cuz you're leavin’.”

“I'm sorry if I insulted you by suggesting a professional rut surrogate.  I know this is a very personal thing.  You deserve…” 

Mick let out a harsh barking laugh.  “When has it ever mattered what I want or deserve?  This is the life I got.  I'm almost fifty years old.  This is probably my last rut, and I ain’t got a mate.”

“What about a partner?” Ray spoke so softly he wasn't sure Mick heard him.  “One who'd do anything for you.”

Mick's blue eyes were exceptionally clear and bright as he met Ray's gaze.  “D'you mean that, Ray?”

“Yes, Mick.  I want to do this with you.”

 

In an instant Ray was knocked backward onto the chaise lounge as Mick fell on his knees before him, searching his face intently. 

“You're so beautiful,” he breathed.  Ray laughed anxiously.

“If you say so.”

“I ever lie to you, Ray?”

“No. I guess not.”

Suddenly serious, Mick held Ray’s hands in his own.

“Gotta warn ya, I don't think I can be gentle at the start.”

“Don’t need you to be.  Could I have a few minutes to get ready?”

Mick nodded. “Sure. I’m gonna make a place for us.  Room’s too big.”

xxx

In fifteen minutes Mick had circled the suite’s furniture and pulled the comforter off the bed to make a cozy nest.  “What, no mood lighting?” Ray teased as he stood in the bathroom doorway wearing only a red and gray striped jockstrap. Mick snorted and tapped a button on the remote control in his hand, shutting off the overhead light to reveal several twinkling lights around the edge of the ceiling.  “Classy enough for ya?  Get over here.”  Mick issued the order calmly, but growled when Ray took a step forward.  “No, do it right.” Cheeks flushed, Ray got down on all fours and began to crawl on his hands and knees, head low with no protection for the back of his neck.  Mick let Ray nuzzle his thighs, mouth his hip bones and huff warm breath across the alpha's already interested genitals. 

“May I?” 

“Mmm, later.  Can't wait.”

Grasping Ray by the shoulders Mick hauled him upward.  Ray rubbed his face all over Mick’s torso, extending his tongue to taste the scarred flesh under his arms.  “I’ll be damned if you aren’t a proper omega.'

“Waited a long time for this,” Ray replied dreamily, his eyelids heavy. 

“You gonna present or I gotta tell you everything?”

Ray obeyed, turning to press his forehead to the carpet, back bowed.  He gasped as Mick raked fingernails over his bare skin, then stilled when thumbs tucked into the elastic around his waist.

“You can leave it on if you want.”

Mick huffed. “Want you bare,” he insisted and pulled off the offending garment.  “If you don't want me to touch your sac I won’t.”

“Actually, skin's pretty sensitive.  Just didn't want to put you off.”

Mick cut him off with a nip on the shoulder as he roughly pushed Ray’s legs apart.  “Getting tired of your whinin’.  Thought I was rutting with Ray Palmer, not some baby omega scared of his own shadow.” Mick lowered his head to bathe Ray’s perineum with his tongue and was rewarded with a shuddering moan. 

“Don’t you worry,” Mick said soothingly.  “Gonna getcha good and wet.”  He uncapped the lubricant and began working Ray open with fingers and tongue.

“Ah!” Ray exclaimed

Slicking himself, Mick wanted to make sure Ray was ready.  “You sure 'bout this – you can take my knot?”

“Hell yes.” 

Mick hummed happily and sheathed himself in Ray's willing body.  Harsh breaths and grunts filled the air as he established a rhythm, his need to control evidenced by his grip on the younger man's hips. 

“Wanted you for so damn long,” Mick confessed abruptly.  “Been dreaming of this since Aruba; push you down on top of your damn sandcastles and take you right there in front of everyone.”

“Ha, thanks for waiting until we didn't have an audience.”

“Don’t like to share.  You're mine.  You're fuckin' mine!”  Mick slammed home and his knot inflated.  Quickly he shoved pillows under his own buttocks to bolster his position as he pulled Ray back, taking some pressure off the other man’s knees while they were stuck together.  “Hey, I was thinkin' you might wanna cum too.”

“Would be nice,” Ray hissed. 

“Should make you wait as punishment for all the teasin'.”

“What, uh, please Mick, Can we talk later?”

“All this time you let me think you were a plain ol' omega.  I waited for you to go into heat, and ask me to take care of you.  Thought you were getting' your needs met elsewhere.  Coulda been havin' ourselves a real good time.”

Ray's hips were shaking. “Mick, please. I need to...”

Mick reached underneath to give Ray's own partially-inflated knot a squeeze making him howl.   “Soon as I found out you had this I knew Snart lied.  Kinky bastard had you fuck him into the mattress, didn't he?”

“Not-your-business.”

“True. S'good you don't fuck and tell.  The things I'm gonna do to you ain't anybody’s business.”

“Could one of those things be you touching my dick?”  Ray tried bracing himself with one arm to free the other which earned him a harsh slap on the rear.

“Who's alpha here?”

“You- ahh-you, Mick.  Please alpha, I need it so bad.  Wanna cum with you inside me.”

Making a small circle with his thumb and index finger, he encircled the head of Ray's swollen cock.  Mick stroked him through first few spurts and held him close.     

xxx 

Ray came back to his senses while Mick was kneading his buttocks. 

“Everything all right back there?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Mick hummed. “Just enjoying you all stretched out around my knot.  Doesn’t hurt?”

“Nope.  Feels good - full.” 

“You can rest.  We’re just gettin’ started.”

Ray yawned and rested his head on his arms. 

 

Ray dozed off a bit, only to be awakened by something warm and spongy nudging at his lips.  Eyes still closed he opened his mouth to accept the head of Mick’s cock on his tongue.  “That’s it,” Mick breathed.  “You take care of me while I make sure you're good to go again.”  Ray realized wasn't as sticky as he'd thought he would be, meaning that Mick had done a little clean up while he napped.  Thick fingers probed his anus, making him shiver.  “No pain?”

“Nnn hhnn.”

“Gonna go slower this time.  Damn you're good.”

 

The jacuzzi tub was a godsend after the third time Mick knotted him just before daybreak.  “You weren’t kidding about this being a bad one,” Ray teased, poking at Mick’s thigh with a bare foot.  “Unless your ruts have always been this intense.”

Mick sunk down so the jets could hit his shoulders.  “Nah.  This is almost as bad as the first time.  I mean as strong.  It’s better cuz I’m not alone.”

“You had to spend your first rut alone? How old were you?”

“Doesn’t matter.  All in the past.  How ‘bout you – you can be alpha.”

Ray sighed.  “No, I can knot.  It’s not the same thing.  I don’t have the same urges.”

“You get laid plenty.”  He scooted over and pulled Ray's head down to kiss him.  Ray wrapped his arms around Mick’s neck and held him close.  They made out until their skin began to wrinkle. 

 

The king-sized bed was wonderfully accommodating of both their bodies as Mick stretched out with Ray’s head resting on his chest.  He carded his fingers through soft dark hair and listened to Ray’s slow even breaths.  “Ray,” he whispered.  “You asleep?”  When there was no answer he took a deep breath and kept talking.  “I’m almost done.  I can feel that itch starting to fade.  Weird thing is, I don’t want it to go away.  So, uh, since I might never get another chance I’m gonna say some stuff.”  In his mind’s eye the candle wick danced and he could hear his grandmother’s soothing voice.  “Beloved mate.  I searched for you.  My fire called to you and now it will be joined to yours.  You fill my heart and make me whole.” 

Xxx

Ray rolled over and opened his eyes to see Nate sitting in the kitchen area.   He was sipping from a steaming mug and looking around with suspicion.  “What’s going on?” Ray asked him.

“You guys didn’t do it over here, did you?”  

“Nah, the chairs didn’t look that sturdy.”

“Wish someone had told me that,” he said ruefully.  “Medical aid at this place is great though.”

 

Ray fashioned a toga out of a sheet.  “Where’s Mick?”

Nate looked surprised.  “You don’t know?  He called and said told me to come over.  I thought he’d be here.”

Ray’s stomach dropped. “Maybe he just went to get some air.”

“Yeah, hey you wanna get something to eat.”

“Sure, I’m starving.  Let me grab a shower real quick.”

“Is anything wrong?”

“No, just he didn’t say anything before he left.  Um, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.”

“Come on.  It doesn't mean anything.  He could be having a swim.”

“Yeah, sure.  You know, I was thinking that when we get back maybe you shouldn’t say anything about this.  He might not want people to know.”

“Ray, don’t do this to yourself.  He’s not gonna treat you like some random...”

“We’ll have to discuss it that’s all.”

 

Nate was gone when he got out of the shower, but he left behind a note and a garment bag.  

Ray got dressed and went to the formal restaurant on the roof of the hotel, under the dome.  The view of the stars was breathtaking.  Nate waved from his table where he was sitting with a lovely young woman.  He pointed to the corner table where Mick was sitting looking very uncomfortable in his tuxedo.  Ray's heart swelled with happiness.  He crossed the room and undid Mick's bow tie.  "There, is that better?"

"Ugh yes.  Can't breathe in those things."   Ray smiled and trailed his fingertips down into the vee of Mick's exposed chest.  

"I like this look."

"Didn't wanna embarrass you during the fancy dinner."  

"Don't have to do that for me," Ray said earnestly.  

Mick squirmed in his chair.  "Yeah well maybe I wanted to okay? I can drink girly drinks and eat tiny foods if I want."

Ray couldn't stop the smile spreading across his face.  "For the record, I hate appletinis and I am ordering the biggest steak.  I need protein.  Someone's been wearing me out."  Mick puffed up like a peacock.  

While they debated what exactly the green things in the soup might be Ray reached for Mick's hand.  "So I was actually half awake this morning when you were talking to me. I didn't understand what you were saying because I don't speak...was that German? Anyway it sounded really nice.  Maybe someday you'll tell say it again."

Mick's lip quivered.  "Maybe," he acknowledged. "I was thinkin' that even though I'm kinda done rut-wise we could stick around a little while.  Nate's still having fun, and it's a nice room.  We deserve a little vacation."

"We do," Ray agreed.  "Of course, I would understand if this was a vacation thing.  I don't expect..."

"I don't always gotta be your alpha.  Could be something...whatever you want."  He coughed nervously.

"I like you being my alpha.  But other stuff is cool too.  We can talk about it."

"Yeah.  That's cool. Talking about it is fine."

Ray leaned over and kissed Mick on the cheek.  "You want my knot, don't you?"

"What? No - maybe -  just curious is all."

"No worries, partner.  I'll be gentle."

"Sure as hell hope not." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please forgive overly talkative Mick. He just can't help himself when it's 'that time'. Personally I want to murder people, but for Mick that's just Tuesday.


End file.
